​ Lola Pistola

“The Smoking Guns of Burlesque”


This Aztec priestess can melt her weight in dark chocolate with one explosive smile, burn through human defenses with her smoldering eyes, and bring mere mortals to their knees with her voluptuosity. You can find her tippling tequila while trifling with suitors’ affections. Of course you’ll find her dazzling, but don’t become too attached -- Lady Lola’s Piscean whimsy makes it difficult to set the hook.  

Lola made her entrance into the world with a song instead of cries.  Conceived of a torrid tryst between the goddess Matlalcueitl and a handsome young Gringo philosopher, and touched by the hands of her goddess aunts -- Mayahuel and Xochiquetzal – she knew from a very early age that she was a Diva, in the truest, most original sense. She wanted to travel the world, wooing all people into debauchery with her langorous alto, wearing outlandish ensembles, sleeping until noon, drinking champagne daily, and visiting beautiful places.


After seeing most of the Universe, and falling madly in love with Rock music and cigarettes, Lola decided it was best to be a Diva on her own terms, so she ran to the soothing, pristine sparkle of the Last Frontier to start VivaVoom Brr-Lesque and bask in the Midnight Sun.

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